Please read this everone..

So, I guess I'll start at the begining here. As most people know, there are a few websites I frequently visit. There's yahoo for my email, there's myspace and facebook for mindless entertainment and catching up with old friends. Also, I go to a website that is a messaging forum for navy wives. I love going to the website, because sometimes, it's nice to talk to people that are in the same boat as you. (no pun intended) It's nice to have someone who isnt going to say "you knew what you were getting into when you married him" or "at least he's not in Iraq" While all of those are true, it doesn't ease the pain when your loved one is gone, or when you havent seen your husband in 3 days and you are laying your son down to bed at night and he's crying for dada. (that was tonight for me) It is hard, and while yes, I knew when I married him that he would be gone a lot, however, that isnt to say that I knew the extent to which it would hurt. (after all, I can tell you I'm going to punch you in the stomach, did your knowing in advance make it hurt any less?)
Well anyway, back to where I was going with that. This navy wives website has been helpful to me many many times, whether it be a question having to do directly with the navy or somthign as random as getting a recipie from someone else. (which I have) But, tonight after I got Gavin down to sleep and I logged on to see what the daily gossip was, and if I could answer anyone else's questions (since they've answered a million of my own) The first post I click on is not good news. A girl was going to school tonight had been hit by a semi. She suffered severe brain injuries, and is now brain dead. She is on life support, and not expected to make it. She was a few years younger than me. She was married in January of this year. Her poor husband. I can't even imagine, she had left for class, and he will never speak to her again.
This makes me wonder. If it were me, what would people remember about me? What was the last thing I said to Nick? Hopefully, it was I love you. What was the last thing I said to my mom, dad, sister, my best friends? Hopefully again, it was I love you.
I think that in my life I have gotten too wrapped up in my own life to remember to tell everyone how much they mean to me. So the point of this is, for all my friends and family, I do love you. I love each and every one of you for different reasons. My friends and family are everything to me, and I can't imagine my life with one less of any of you. Hopefully, everyone knows that, however I doubt that they do becuase I know that I do not say it enough. So, I am going to be making a concious effort to be sure that I do tell everyone how much I love them, and how much I care for each and every person. If somthing were to happen to me, because it could have been anyone driving beside that semi tonight in Fresno, I want everyone to know how I feel about them.
It is terrible that somthing as sad as what has happened to Alyssa tonight, had to happen to make me realize just how much I take for granted. I realize just how lucky I am to be able to pick up my phone and scroll through the contacts list and be able to call any one of the many numbers in there and spill my heart out to them, and know that they honestly care. I hope that everyone who sees my number thinks the same thing, however, I'm sure that they don't because how many times have I said "oh I'll call you right back" or how many times do I just not answer becuase I'm to busy. I am going to start making time for people. Of course I'm not perfect, no one is, but I need people to know how much they mean to me, and hopefully, when they think of me, they'll immediatly think of my love for them.
I am especially guilty of underappreciation here at home with nick. I take him for granted so so much. I mean I always tell him I love him, and a quick peck as he walks out the door, but it has become so routine for us, that I'm afraid it has lost it's meaning. So, this means I need to stretch myself and figure out a way to really show Nick how much he means to me. Then, I need to brach to each and every other person in my life. Everyone in my life deserves a personal and heartfelt expression of my love and appreciation for them in my life. I'm not sure how just yet, but give me time and I'll figure somthign out.

Until then though, everyone please know that you mean more than anything to me. Everyone in my life has been so loving and supportive of me and what I have choosen to do with my life, and has done nothing but help me reach goals. I appreciate that, and can never thank you enough for it.

Oh, and if you have a spare minute, please say a prayer for the family. It's going to be rough on all of them.