What now?

This is mostly a vent out of frustration, because I really don't have anyone to talk about this with, and I think quite honestly, it'll help me just to get it out. Also, I do realize that I need to update from Christmas and everythign else that's going on, but right now, I just need to get some stuff out.

Ok, so on to my rant. Currently, I am 11 weeks pregnant, and that is the basis for the whole issue this particular blog is devoted to. Now, being in the military, we have good health coverage. As long as we are on what is called Tricare Prime, everything is covered 100%. It's amazing. No copays no deductibles, no nothing, just go to the dr and go home. When I had Gav, it was 100% on their dime, I didn't pay a cent. Being under this coverage though is what I have an issue with. Like I said, its GREAT, it's amazing that we are offered this kind of benifit. The issue is (and I believe why you hear "I HATE TRICARE" so often) is that you have to be seen at a Military Treatment Facility (MFT) if they have room to provide service for you. This is where my issue is. Right now, they want me to go and deliver Baby #2 at Langley Airforce Base, which has it's own devoted hospital. (therefore not costing the military money to send me to a civilian hospital.)
Well, Langely is where I delivered Gavin at, and I had nothign but problems while I was there. Honestly, with all of thing things that went wrong while I was there, I am truely scared to go back into that hospital again.
A few highlights from my delivery there (although the list is much longer, these are the worst offences in my mind):
*was told that I would hear within 12-24 hours if I had pre-eclampsia. However, 3 days later I got a call saying to get myself in immedaitly because I had advance pre-e and was at high risk of having a stroke. (great, glad i didnt have a stroke in the 3 DAYS before I should have known!)
*was asked if I would allow a student to place my epidural. I said no, I didnt even want the student in the room watching. The student was not only in the room, but attempted to place my epidural *3* times while the "supervising doctor" was turned around talking on the cell phone. When I tried to ask for her to stop or to call for another dr. I was told to "shut up, it'll be over faster if I was still and quiet".
*had 26 hours of unnecessary labor. Had they done an ultrasound when I arrived (as I requested) then they would have known that Gavin was to big, and would not be coming out naturally.
*After the resulting c-section, while I was still in the hospital "recovering" they would regularly take Gavin and do his testing and things like that. They took him one day and returned with a different baby! I didnt notice it because she (yes they brought me a girl!) was faced away from me and I could only see blanket and hat, and my mom asked why they put a pink shirt on him and turned "him" around for me to see, yeah, it was a little asian girl that they had brought and left with us. When Iwas talking to the head nurse, and of course crying because to me, Gavin was missing at that point, she told me to "hush and calm down, its not that big of a deal" Ok, so if bringing the wrong baby and LEAVING it unattended with people other than his/her parents isnt a big deal, I'm certainly not having my child there.

I suppose my biggest issue here is that they say as long as they have "space available" for you, that they (the MTF) will provide your care. This is my problem, what is the definition of having space availalbe? Everytime I was seen there, I had to wait 5-6 weeks for an appointment. Critical bloodwork that is preformed during pregnancy takes 5+ weeks to get the results back for. A life threatening complication to me and my child was missed for DAYS, when I was supposed to be alerted within hours. Up until you are farther along in pregnancy (I believe until 3rd trimester) you are seen in GROUP appointments. Meaning, you go to your appointment with 15 people that are around the same point in pregnancy as you. You have your prenatal appoints with 10-15 total strangers, and no personal care. To me, these things say that there is not adequate space available. This is the major flaw of the Tricare/Military healthcare system. There is a problem in that they will claim to have space available to treat you, when in fact, there is not. All of the things I mentioned to me, say that that is not adequate care, and definatly not personalized and comfortable care when I think a woman deserves it most.
I am working with the patient advocate right now trying to be released from care, but she is isgnoring me. Completly. I am 11 weeks and I have not been to a doctor once. I've tried explaining everything to her, giving a detailed factual list of what happened when I delivered Gavin there, and have been told that she will "let me know" if I'm released from care there. Without being released from care at the MTF they designated me to, my insurance is no good, anywhere and everythign will be out of pocket.
I'm truly at a crossroads. I do not feel safe at this hospital, I can not and will not subject myself of my child to that again.
I do have one option, which I most likly will be taking, becuase I need to go to the dr and have proper prenatal care, is to change from aforementioned Tricare Prime, to Tricare Standard. With standard, I have copays and deductibles, as well as services that are not covered. However, I can go to the doctor/hospital of my choice. Including civilian care. My primary care manager (pcm) through Tricare Prime, is a civilian. (because all of the MTF women's care clinics were full of undoubtably pregnant women because that is ALL they see at the Langley Women's Clinic) So, when I talked to Tricare, and asked if I could have my referal to stay with my current PCM, I was told no, that I had to go to the MTF that had availablity. So now, to continue seeing the doctor that I have seen for the last year, and I really like, I am going to have to pay out of pocket, which really bites, because I really don't feel that it should be this way. After all, the military touts their "free healthcare" so much, its supposed to be the one big perk of being in the military, and now I'm going to have to CHOOSE to take myself out of the supposed "wonderful free healthcare" and enroll in the "pay for it if you want to see a qualified doctor" plan. I've appealed to the hospital and to Tricare, and nothing has come of it. It's getting to the point that I really need to be getting appropriate care, and Langley just can not offer it to me. So yeah, it's on to paying for my "free healthcare". (of course I'll willingly pay to feel like I can safely deliver my child, its more the principle at this point)
Like I said though, I really don't have a beef with Tricare, it the specific MTF that I am dealing with. I hear so much Tricare bashing on a regular basis, but honestly, I've never had a single issue with Tricare. Langley on the other hand, the one specific hospital that happens to be the closest MFT to my house, is a problem. I don't want to be mixed into the "tricare whiners" group, because I'm actaully very grateful to tricare for the coverage they provide, and as they have said, their hands are tied. As soon as Langely releases me from their care, they'll be happy to put me with the occice/hospital of my choice. Langely however, and their patient advocate (great title for someone who completly ignores me on a regular basis and has no concern over my situation) are completly blocking the process. UGH.
Anyway, there's my rant for now, I really just needed to get it out of my system and seeing it writen out does actaully help. Anyways, keep your fingers crossed that somthign good happens from this!